When I launched my substack I said about myself in my first post "I don't do vulnerability." It is hard. And dangerous - opening yourself up for others to view and judge. Who knows what will happen? You did it in this post, you do it often, it takes courage and honesty and a certain special ability to be able to conduct this examination of self in the first place. I think it helps us, not only do we see you, but we can harness your xray vision, turn it on ourselves and with some luck learn some truths.
Allowing yourself to be vulnerable just takes practice, like anything else. The more you do it, the more you feel how it doesn't hurt at all. In fact it heals!
Oh my…all of this. I mean, there IS the free ferry rides coming up….and, ummm… okay…free ferry rides is all I got. As always, you nailed it BA. Thanks for wrestling all the stuff into words that left me laughing, nodding, and pulling my hair back a little tighter to try and maintain my fight against the gravitational pull of my wrinkles.
I'm 42. And I'm consciously turning towards women older than me for wisdom, advice, and grace. I'm slowly turning away from looking at younger women for aesthetics and health as well, and I want to practice more patience towards them ... and their silly, cute stuff.
Greetings from "middle age", I guess. I like it here, in between it all, actually.
Yes, middle age is great! I'm 42 as well! 💩 At least, I *think* I am...
I think it's great that you're looking toward women who are older than you. Shouldn't that be the natural order? As everyone knows, our culture is youth-obsessed. But there's much richer shit to be gained from the old women 👵🏻👵🏼👵🏽👵🏾👵🏿
B.A. I have nothing much thoughtful to say except this piece made me laugh at least a dozen times and is the kind of wisdom I'd like to grow into. I'm an elder millennial so all the cool kids for me were Gen X'ers and they're all 50 now, which is strange and funny. But you know what? they're still cool and glam to me, as I'm sure you are to them. And to me, too!
Ah, BA, what a wise and witty gem of a being you are....wait...does wisdom infer aged? EEK
I see my mother looking back at me more and more when I catch my reflection and my grandmother is starting to appear around my neck and chest...le sigh...now sorely regretting all the chicken neck jokes aimed at her in my ignorant youth...but wait, what are these shining moments of liberation? Could it be acceptance? Could it be not only acceptance but embracing myself and loving myself, finally, at long last? My grandmother used to say that youth was wasted on the young. How right she was.
"Beyond a hundred steps of wisdom, I will be free from good and bad. Beyond the veils I will find such Splendor, such Beauty, that I will fall in love with Myself." Rumi
Oh dear, I guess I was remiss in failing to mention the POSITIVES of aging… isn’t that just like me 😅. Most definitely, yes, everything you said. There is indeed the coming into one’s own, and the self-acceptance, and the freedom that comes with no longer being on that same stupid playing field. How long did it take me to get over feeling “different”? Oh, way too long.
When I launched my substack I said about myself in my first post "I don't do vulnerability." It is hard. And dangerous - opening yourself up for others to view and judge. Who knows what will happen? You did it in this post, you do it often, it takes courage and honesty and a certain special ability to be able to conduct this examination of self in the first place. I think it helps us, not only do we see you, but we can harness your xray vision, turn it on ourselves and with some luck learn some truths.
Allowing yourself to be vulnerable just takes practice, like anything else. The more you do it, the more you feel how it doesn't hurt at all. In fact it heals!
Oh my…all of this. I mean, there IS the free ferry rides coming up….and, ummm… okay…free ferry rides is all I got. As always, you nailed it BA. Thanks for wrestling all the stuff into words that left me laughing, nodding, and pulling my hair back a little tighter to try and maintain my fight against the gravitational pull of my wrinkles.
Free ferry rides! Oh boy, can't wait.
Haha... keep pulling... just don't pull so hard that you end up with the Jane Fonda affect. Thanks as always Kristine!
😂
It’s all in the next steps.
Thank you BA
You speak of so many wise truths.
Thanks Trish 🥲
Great read, BA!
I'm 42. And I'm consciously turning towards women older than me for wisdom, advice, and grace. I'm slowly turning away from looking at younger women for aesthetics and health as well, and I want to practice more patience towards them ... and their silly, cute stuff.
Greetings from "middle age", I guess. I like it here, in between it all, actually.
Yes, middle age is great! I'm 42 as well! 💩 At least, I *think* I am...
I think it's great that you're looking toward women who are older than you. Shouldn't that be the natural order? As everyone knows, our culture is youth-obsessed. But there's much richer shit to be gained from the old women 👵🏻👵🏼👵🏽👵🏾👵🏿
B.A. I have nothing much thoughtful to say except this piece made me laugh at least a dozen times and is the kind of wisdom I'd like to grow into. I'm an elder millennial so all the cool kids for me were Gen X'ers and they're all 50 now, which is strange and funny. But you know what? they're still cool and glam to me, as I'm sure you are to them. And to me, too!
Thank you Isabel! You are too kind. I mean, SERIOUSLY. I sent you a private message last night about all the ways you made my day yesterday ❤️🔥
“I don’t care whether or not young people think I’m cool. They don’t have eyes that can see how cool I am.” Love this!
👁️LOL👁️
Ah, BA, what a wise and witty gem of a being you are....wait...does wisdom infer aged? EEK
I see my mother looking back at me more and more when I catch my reflection and my grandmother is starting to appear around my neck and chest...le sigh...now sorely regretting all the chicken neck jokes aimed at her in my ignorant youth...but wait, what are these shining moments of liberation? Could it be acceptance? Could it be not only acceptance but embracing myself and loving myself, finally, at long last? My grandmother used to say that youth was wasted on the young. How right she was.
"Beyond a hundred steps of wisdom, I will be free from good and bad. Beyond the veils I will find such Splendor, such Beauty, that I will fall in love with Myself." Rumi
Oh dear, I guess I was remiss in failing to mention the POSITIVES of aging… isn’t that just like me 😅. Most definitely, yes, everything you said. There is indeed the coming into one’s own, and the self-acceptance, and the freedom that comes with no longer being on that same stupid playing field. How long did it take me to get over feeling “different”? Oh, way too long.